O.M.G... i'm sooo tired.....

yea... so i got up at 4:50 because i have to go to a morning prayer.... XDDD
just this isn't too bad... but today's going to be a TIRING day... because i have a morning prayer from 6 to 7, track practice from 9 to whenever.... tkd club practice for another hour or two... then a sectional for F-horn... awesome! :) i know it'll be fun doing all that but i still will be madd tired... DX XDD oh wellz... :3

So... as promised xDD

today was alright i guess... the day started with tired/귀찮은 feeling but as the day went by, it got better :)
track was fun, tkd club was fun. ESPECIALLY, LASAGNA MELLOS MADE TODAY WAS AWESOME!!!  :3
i kind of have a worry though... I really need/have to go to church tomorrow... but i really don't want to go... D: i just... feel so guilty... D:

Time

I don't know how it works but somehow, for some reasons, I can remember last thanksgiving and christmas like yesterday, but i can't even remember what happened during the beginning of this year nor can i remember yesterday....
I remember smiling a lot last year... and i wonder, where did all the smiles go? Why am i not smiling any more?...

missing something in my life

man... it's really a depressing thing that i can't say the things i want and to the person(s) i want to say to... sometimes i need to let things go but... it's just "wrong" to do so....
i need to better control myself...

Bible.... XDD

Matthew 7:7-8

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.

Sigh....

I'm feeling that random depression... XDD which is weird because usually only girls have it during their time of the month right? That of course i wouldn't know for sure since i'm not a girl but still... XDDD

but yea.... ups and downs... downs then ups... random stuff... but whatever right?... time will solve it XD

Baby!!

omg... today, i went to pastor Josiah's house to see his baby... O.M.G!! adorableee XDD

but after that, i didn't have a ride back home so i had to run home.... to be in time for the tutoring... XDDD but it was fun? :3

Awkward Stare...

These days, a friend is giving me this weird, not so much as hateful, but disliking stare... and doesn't really respond to what i say...

I'm just confused and sad why my friend is giving me that stare and ignoring me because i don't remember what i've done wrong... maybe my friend is just feeling depressed these days?

i donno... i hope that's the case.. not that i want my friend to be down, but because i don't want to believe that i did something wrong...

hopefully, time will tell me what is going on and what i've done wrong if i did something wrong...

Harvesters

In today's Harvesters meeting, hardly anyone opened up... like only 5 people spoke out of 25~30 people... :/

it's hard to make others open their hearts and share their stories, but it gets me down as well as other officers, especially Bara...

The club did improve from the beginning of the year, but I just wish there would be more fellowship among the members because that's what Harvesters are for! It is for the people, fellow believers, who are suffering in their hard time....

maybe the officers, including myself, aren't dedicated enough for God to move their hearts? i don't know... but i hope we can be closer together in Christ...

Today...

I walked home with Young Bin nuna and she told me some interesting rumors/love stories of others/gossip... I was entertained to listen to such stories, but i came to wonder...

how oblivious am i to my surrounding? what do others think of me? what do they talk about me and my actions if they talk about them?

I wouldn't know... after all, i always heard stories after when everything was already over and forgotten.

but sometimes... like now... i come to wonder....

how exactly am i viewed?

Choices

There are many poems, stories, experiences and others that talk about what choice I should be making. It's outdated, yet still hits me hard when I ACTUALLY need to make the choice...Weird isn't it?

choices... ironically, the hardest one to pick isn't when i have many choices... but it's when i only have two to choose from...

and i know what i should be choosing but i simply can't... but it's not like i can choose the other choice....

and time passes by fast... so fast that i don't have the chance to choose anything....

First official blogging I guess...

What would happen to this blog, I do not know. But i'm starting this blog because my friend asked me to and here it is :)

let's see what happens and let's use this blog to discuss our worries because I don't think this blog would be known to people who aren't really close to me XD

so.... what's up? my ears are ready :)